Excuse our title, this isn’t a guide on how to become that creepy guy who strikes up conversation with the drained and disinterested on public transport- sorry if that’s what you were after, I’m sure you’ll get there some day! Instead you will find our guide on how to seize the moment and get chatting to that person who caught your eye (and maybe your heart). You’ll never miss an opportunity again!
#1. Go for it!
Someone caught your eye? Go talk to that head-turner now. Don’t hesitate or overthink it as the more you do, the less likely you are to engage them. “Hello” will do, and compliments work well too, within boundaries- “I love your butt” is NOT the way to start a lasting conversation, “That dress looks great on you” is more like it.
#2. Listen up
The real key to great chat has little to do with what you say - there’s much more to gain from shutting your mouth and listening. Taking in what your conversational counterpart has to say will have you reacting naturally and without an agenda (even if you have one). This raw exchange will keep things instinctive and in the moment and stop you from overthinking what you’re going to say next.
#3. Repeat after me
Repeating what the other party has just said to you is an excellent way of letting them know you’re listening. Likewise, mirroring their actions helps build rapport and a sense of familiarity.
#4. Be wrong
Not everyone is going to have the same opinion as you, but that doesn’t make anyone’s views any less valid. Challenging conversations are important ones to be had, and something that a lot of us look for in potential partners. So if you come across a bit of turbulence in what otherwise seemed like a smooth ride it may not be all bad. The key to having an enjoyable debate is to remain open minded and listen to others points. You never know, you might have your mind changed.
#5. Cut to the chase
If it’s a date you’re looking for, it’s perfectly fine to save steps 2-4 until after you’ve got this in the bag. Taking the direct approach shows that you know what you want and you mean business. After all, confidence is sexy. After your opening compliment (or “Hey, my name is…”). Put on your best smoulder and ask if they want to hang out some time. There will never be a perfect time, so make your move! Whatever their response, it gets the awkward part out of the way and lets you know if you’re playing the same game.